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I've had to do some serious reckoning

 I had to do a lot before I could begin to write this, did more continuously through the writing process, and will no doubt continue to do so for as long as I draw breath. Unbecoming is a prolonged and arduous process when you have much to dissect and atone for. The self-examination took a good six months. It took that long to locate, identify, assess, and then purge my thoughts and my system of the bile and venom. Of the attitudes and characteristics that weren't serving me or others well. Sharing and opening up about this is the hard part. Being this transparent is difficult. But it's also cleansing and necessary. I have felt a sense of great shame, and had to sit with it for a long time. Still do at times. Shame comes in waves. But, at the same time, I'm mindful of the fact that just sitting in shame is a but of a copout. When you've screwed up really badly, there's a lot of reparation work to do. There's karmic debt to repay, and one begins to atone and set

Calling Right Wrong and Wrong Right

 That's when you know a society has fallen. We have truly gotten to that place, where we have perfected the art of justification. For the most blatant example, look at what the right has done to the image of Christ. There are now millions of people n the US identifying as Christian, invoking the name of the man they allege is their Lord, and displaying beliefs and behaviors that are clearly not Christ-like, that are the very antithesis of true Christianity. And they are so far gone they will allow a man who can't even quote a bible verse to use that bible as a prop for a cheap, self-serving stunt and make a mockery of the religion they claim to held dear and be the supposed basis of their lives. That is madness. justification and blindness to that level of hypocrisy is difficult to fathom for those on the outside looking in. It's the kind of madness that one can only see objectively by pulling back, taking a lot of time to quietly reflect. This is a biggie: Being so full o

Words as Weapons

 Let's examine what's happened to our language. The words and expressions we use are overblown and unnecessary, intended to incite. We've begun to use words like "sociopath" to describe people for whom such a characterization is clearly inapt. Example, referring to an athlete as one simply because she didn't perform. This strangest thing about this is the failure of these people to recognize they're willingly supporting and making lame justifications for someone who truly does have sociopathic tendencies.

Lockdown was the best thing the dissension makers could have asked for

 There was a small contingent of online "researchers," but now they were joined by millions more who suddenly had nothing better to do but be online in on social media. They were already anxious, angry, suspicious, and now they had people ready to plug them into the conspiracy mindset and groom them. It's heady, it makes you feel smart and special. You get the idea you've come across secret knowledge, little known information.

Belief in a cabal

 Thing is, when you blame everything on a shadowy cabal, your brain doesn't require direct proof or much in the way of evidence. You're all too ready to accept whatever comes around as evidence, and to blow out of proportion the slightest suggestion that something smells off.  Alice Liu type memes. Who was doing this? Definitely not organic in nature. We are destroying an entire society on the basis of suggestive remarks by a few unscrupulous people who have only their own interests at heart. We're only too happy now to do the bulk of the work for them. They make a suggestive remarks, we make it go viral and cultivate it do it becomes bigger, a beast. They nk about that shooting in museum. What made me think it was related to a larger conspiracy and a false flag or fakery? I have no proof or even good reason except it looked a little strange and was one in a string of events I'd already decided looked off, so I wove it into my web, my narrative. Used it to buoyed up my

I've had to work on myself first

 And, boy, is that a monumental task. Quiet, and turning inward is essential first step. 

It's not really about a patriot fight, nor a satanic pedophilic cabal

What they're *really* angry about is feeling that they don't matter anymore. That their voices, their concern, their values, their livelihoods, and their very lives and existence don't matter or count. Like their being run roughshod over. They feel at risk of becoming the new century's underclass, the n******, and they don't like it.  Can they really know what they're really angry about if what they think and say they're angry about isn't even real?  What's going on is that they have to try and make their fight sound like it's about something noble, like patriotism, the fight for freedom, liberty, or the vulnerable. Because what it's really about they're ashamed to say out loud because it makes them seem weak and pathetic. They're saying, "See me. Acknowledge me and my right to exist and have a say." That sounds weak, so they put on a show of bravado. It's common bully behavior. Hit first and talk loudly before someone n